Moving with The Current

Brandon and I were married for 11 years prior to beginning our journey of adoption. During that 11 years, we fought the fight of infertility month after month, year after year. Even though it had been a casual topic of conversation at times, it wasn't until the wee hours of July 13, 2016, that the Lord confirmed for both of us that NOW was the time to pursue adoption. As if it were a race against time, our feet hit the ground running! Seventeen days after that early morning confirmation, we had our (very long) application/we-want-to-know-you-inside-and-out forms submitted and our contract signed with a wonderful faith-based adoption consultant group out of Atlanta, GA. Ironically, something we obviously didn't realize at the time, our first son, Groves would be born ONE YEAR to the day that we signed our paperwork. 

The events that occurred during that one year span is now the story of our journey. A hand-held guided tour with the Lord that led us through three failed adoptions, two of which we traveled to the baby, held the baby, named the baby, but did not come home with the baby. Having never been pregnant, I knew this level of devastation was the closest thing that we would ever experience to losing a child at birth. 

What many do not realize, is the financial loss that also occurs during a failed adoption. Due to the preparation that is involved in the days/weeks/months leading up to the birth of a child with an adoption plan, much of the funding has already been utilized in the form of attorney/legal fees, agency fees, social workers/case worker hours, birth parent expenses, etc. After our first failed adoption, which occurred in November 2016, we lost almost $6,000. Yes, gone...only to lose even more during the second failed adoption on Easter weekend 2017. Fortunately, by the Grace of God, family had the ability to step in and provide where there was lack. Otherwise, we would not have been able to recover enough to continue the process. In was then, that we realized the crippling affects that failed or disrupted adoptions can have on families. So much so, they may have to forfeit the opportunity to adopt altogether. There's something about that that didn't sit well with us. Little did we know, the Lord was going to use every bit of our experiences in order to birth a resource to assist families in this very situation. 

On March 6, 2017, a window of time between our first two failed adoptions, the Lord dropped the words "The Current" into my mind during my quiet time. It was so strong that I wrote the words in my journal and added the definition of a current. Even a few days later, on March 9th, it was still on my mind and I thanked the Lord for sharing those words with me: "Thank You for this powerful word the other night, Lord. I am in awe of Your powerful plans! Only You know the what, when, and how, God, but I know that I rest in the fact that I surrender it all to You. Everything, God."

Exactly three years later, in March of 2020, we were busy with two toddlers and renovating a house. Again, the Lord brought those same words back to my mind: The Current. This time, I took it to Brandon and I shared with him the pressing and the prompting that I was feeling from God. In light conversation, I told him that I wondered if the Lord wanted us to start something pertaining to adoption - maybe a subscription of sorts that would raise proceeds that go directly to families who have experienced substantial financial loss during a failed adoption. He was in agreement and liked the idea very much, but he honestly struggled with how the word "current" was directly related to adoption. I certainly didn't have the answer, so we both just shrugged and moved on with life. Two more months passed, when Brandon came to me. "Jeni, I know. God showed me what it means. It was THE CURRENT that took Moses down the river to Pharaoh's daughter. The current brought him home." 

Y'all. I flatlined. I mean, I SEE YOU, GOD!! Only He can drop a word into our hearts during the hardest, most painful time of our lives, only to use it as proof that His plan was Good all along. Nothing is in vain with the Lord. He will use every bit for His Kingdom.